I Resent You

I resent you with every fiber of my being. I lay awake at night, and insomnia plagues me as I think of all the ways you have ruined me. My hopes and dreams are stuck in an unidentified place inside of me and I am numb, unable to react to life. Where my emotions once sprung from is now filled with resentment and calcified. I cannot feel, I do not care and I am void. I resent you.

What is Resentment?

Resentment is the strong and painful bitterness you feel when someone does or says something wrong to you. It doesn’t have a physical weight, but it feels emotionally heavy and can last a long time. Often times, the manifestations of depression come from unresolved resentment.

Resentment doesn't have a physical weight, but it feels emotionally heavy and can last a long time. Click To Tweet

Effects of Resentment

When you are wronged physically, emotionally or otherwise and have not had an opportunity to let those emotions out by confronting the person who has wronged you, you may experience implosive or explosive feelings of depression. Overtime resentment can stew inside you like molten lava inside a volcano ready to erupt. Like a volcano, letting all those emotions explode uncontrollably, in the form of anger or aggression, attacks the issue but also causes mass destruction to life surrounding the explosion. In contrast, when resentment is held in and never released, like the trapped energy of lightning, a self-destructive implosion occurs. Unlike the explosion, the issue is never attacked or resolved. Instead, a vacuum of heavy feelings, pain, and destruction is formed inside and may cause low-self worth and isolation. When you carry around resentment for years without any form of release this may be the outcome, but there is an alternative.

Overtime resentment can stew inside you like molten lava inside a volcano ready to erupt. Click To Tweet

Releasing Resentment

When a volcano is allowed to gradually erupt over time it can form a small island of refuge for life to begin above the issue. Likewise, when the trapped energy of lightning is channeled with a metal rod it can create a beautiful masterpiece out of many fragmented pieces of sand. So don’t hold in those emotions and wait for destruction, positively release them or channel them using positive measures, such as:

  1. Talking to the person who wronged you.
  2. Writing the person who wronged you a letter or note
  3. Empowering others who have suffered the same as you in a way that validates your feelings
  4. Writing about your experience and add what you wish your response had been when you felt wronged.
  5. Speaking with a therapist that specializes in resentment

Many may not be ready to let go because there is still something comforting about holding on to the pain, but unresolved resentment will continue to present itself in your decisions and emotional state. Conversely, letting go of the resentment inside of you gives you power and control over your emotional state.

My own experience with resentment has taught me that it has both physical and emotional consequences, and the best way to rid yourself of those consequences is FORGIVENESS. Forgive those who have hurt you, forgive yourself, let go and live.

Are you ready to release your resentment?

Forgive those who have hurt you, forgive yourself, let go and live. Click To Tweet

Want to understand more about depression? Check out Adenike’s Story and Brittani’s Story

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It's Brittani & Adenike (a.k.a. Nikki), we hope you are enjoying our blog. We are just two sisters sharing our experiences in order to encourage other women who have experienced depression. We'd love to stay in touch. Join our email list for our latest advice and exclusive resources. 

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