Valentine’s Day can be a day of waiting and stressing about who is going to profess their love for you. That’s not all; Valentine’s Day can bring the stress of not only waiting to see who is going to profess their love for you but also how their love will be expressed. If and when you get a gift or some kind of expression of love then it will be analyzed. You’ll ask yourself was the gift good enough, cost enough? And what quality of reciprocal love does the gift warrant. STOP IT! Don’t wait for Valentine’s Day to value yourself. You are worthy every day of the year. In this blog, I’m going to help you start learning to value yourself on Valentine’s Day and beyond.


Build a Life That You Love

Don’t give away your power and your responsibility for your happiness. This is what you’re doing when you wait for people to value you before you value yourself. Depending on someone else for love sets you up to be devastated when they leave. Start owning your inner and outer beauty. Learn to compliment yourself without feeling guilty. Don’t believe it when people say loving yourself, self-love, and self-care is arrogant. Read my post about my journey to self- love. The first step to learning to value yourself is to build a life that you love by focusing on what you need.  Build a life that you love by enjoying activities with your family and friends. Do not wait for a proverbial Knight in shining armor to explore life and to be happy. Build a life that you love and shine from the inside out. Your inner beauty will attract all kinds of positivity in your life.


Let Your Light Shine

Learning to value yourself means knowing that you have something to offer this world, and letting your light shine.  My son’s kindergarten class made cards and parents donated Valentine’s candy. The teachers would randomly distribute the cards and candy to the kids, this way everyone got something special from a friend. This was a great exercise in letting your light shine. You can practice how to let your light shine too; with small acts of kindness. Some ways I do this is I take my son and a friend or 2 to the movies, braid hair for my friend’s kids, I share tea packets or Keurig coffee pods with coworkers and I keep candy on my desk and motivational quotes in my office for all to see. I have people who in return share with me as well. When I receive random gifts I feel good because it’s an unexpected act of kindness.  You will receive light when you let your light shine. 


Focus on Healing

When you heal your inner self, you start knowing what you need and learning to value yourself. Healing will also help you focus on building a life that you love and letting your light shine. Focusing on emotional healing, makes you feel good from the inside. As you begin to health you will shift into a place of  truly feeling good versus just looking like you have it all together. This helps you to grow into your true self and brings you  joy. This type of joy continues way beyond the temporary happiness that any person or thing could give. This is because no person or material thing can  give you joy. Happiness comes when you are loved; joy comes when you love yourself and others.

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Learn to value yourself.  

Meet the Author

Adenike is a 46-year-old Jamaican immigrant and a devoted single mother of one, whom she raised with a village in the absence of the father whom long aborted his responsibilities. She holds a Masters in Licensed Clinical Social Work, Bachelors in Social Work, Masters in Non-Profit & Association Management and a Licensed Practical Nursing degree.  From the outside, you wouldn’t know that behind the many accomplishments are experiences of trauma, PTSD and depression. Her experiences have uniquely shaped her and she has learned to appreciate each and every part of who she is and her journey. Now she wants to inspire you to do the same!


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